What to do following a break-up

What to do following a break-up
Some break-ups are welcomed, and some not so much. Whether you just broke someone’s heart, or someone just broke yours into a million little pieces, the AmorDating team is here to help with some advice.

A research study published in the Journal of Neurophysiology suggests that the trauma from breaking up can be severe because love rejection affects primitive areas of the brain associated with motivation, reward and addiction craving. This study explains the painful feelings that go along with a break-up, as well as the extreme behaviours that can occur as a result.  

Below are just some of the ways of healing and feeling better after a break-up, as well as some advice on what not to do right after breaking up.
It takes timeYou have to stop thinking that things will get better right away. Give yourself a little time to grieve for the loss of a friendship and partnership. It’s better to grieve now than to try to avoid these inescapable feelings.

Don’t get serious too soon after a break-upThere is a difference between enjoying your newly single status (make sure you are safe and protected!) and getting emotional with someone new and jumping right into another relationship. You may think you have a good connection with someone, but the timing is off so proceed with caution to have a better chance of sustaining the relationship.

Get rid of reminders of the relationshipWhether it’s pictures, cards and letters or gifts, if you don't want to throw them out, give them to a friend to hold on to for the time being. Don’t rush out and destroy everything, you may look back and wish you’d kept a few mementos. Think with a cool head!

Don’t post every thought and feeling on FacebookTechnology is great, it allows us to share great moments with friends and stay connected. However, not everyone needs to know your every thought after a break-up. Some things are better left unsaid or said to a trusted friend. It can be extremely awkward not only for you but also for your friends if you write personal things about your ex online.

Rely on friends, but do not overwhelm themIt’s always great to have friends to get you through the tough times. However, try not to make it all about you. Don’t spend all your time crying or saying mean things about your ex, take some time to listen to your friends as well. They might also be going through a tough time, or they might have some happy news they want to share with you but are worried about how you will receive it.

Take up a hobbyThis is a great way to keep your mind on something other than your ex. From going to a painting or cooking class, music or dance lessons, or simply joining a gym, the possibilities are endless. Just take the first step, get out of your room and distract yourself with a fun activity!

Do not make a dramatic, life changing decisionWhen fresh from a break-up, people often look for something to get them out of the bad state they are in. DO NOT make a drastic change in your life, such as getting a new haircut (ladies, you know better than to head for the hairdresser), quitting your studies or job or moving away.

Take a short tripIn line with the previous advice of not making any sudden decisions, we highly recommend a nice, relaxing weekend away. It’s enough to get you out of your environment without being too drastic. You can bring a friend with you, it’s always better to have support in times like these. It’s best that the trip not be longer than a weekend as you will still be raw from recent events. Wait until you feel a bit better, and you will enjoy your trip a lot more.

Stay positive and think about your future. Enjoy life and don’t worry about the past.
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